Between the ages of 18 and 25, you are laying down a foundation for the rest of your life. Life before age 18, aka your childhood, was largely out of your control. But now that you’ve stepped into adulthood, it’s time to take the reins. Read on for a few practical tips to be successful.
The Nots Have It All
There’s a time for doing all the things and a time for not doing all the things. When you’re stepping into a new sense of independence, the challenge is to NOT do the things. It is more difficult to not go to crazy parties. It will be hard to not spend beyond your means and go into exuberant debt. When you’re surrounded by women exposing themselves in the way they dress and act, it will be difficult to choose NOT to join in.
But choosing to not x-y-z will benefit your future self. It’s simple delayed gratification. Once you lose control at a party, spend all your money, and/or reveal yourself, you can’t undo it. Of course, you can change and grow after making choices you regret, but resisting to say, “yes” at the first go around will save your future self a whole lot of work.
Somebody has to be Promoted Eventually
Even if you feel like a novice now, eventually you can be an expert in whatever you give your attention to. Whether it’s medicine, art, writing, athletics, mothering, etc. As each day passes, you will gain experience, knowledge, skill, and confidence. And so will everyone else giving their attention to the same subject. Eventually, you won’t be a 25-year-old journalist. You will be a 45-year-old journalist with 20 years of experience.
It’s up to you if those 20 years are just a series of days strung together, or a series of challenges conquered, and lessons learned. Contrary to the idea of “the nots have it all”, once you’ve resisted the temptations to engage in destructive behavior, it’s time to do things. It’s easy to clock-in to work and do the bare minimum until it’s time to clock out. It takes more effort to go the extra mile at work. But take on the extra tasks, really listen and speak up in meetings, and get to know your co-workers. And, frankly, it may look like you’re doing it for the benefit of the company you work for, but you’re really doing it for you.
When that promotion comes available, or a rare opportunity knocks at your door, you will be a well-rounded, proven, and exceptional candidate because you made the most of the time that was passing anyways.
God is the Master Planner – So Leave Room for Divine Intervention
I know you’ve heard this before – we can plan our lives down to the bone, but God’s will always prevails. Which is such a good thing! He created us after all, don’t you suppose He knows best?
But how can we live according to God’s will? We can read the Bible and pray His will be done in our lives. We can base our decision making on the rules for life He gave us. People like to say life didn’t come with an instruction manual, but the ten commandments are a pretty straightforward guide. The challenge is we don’t want to honor God and love our neighbor before ourselves.
But if we focus on what God commanded of us, we actually free ourselves of a lot of stress and pressure of the world. It’s not up to us to find our purpose. God calls us to serve our neighbor in ANY and EVERY position in life. The specifics of the jobs and titles we hold don’t matter if we use our positions to be of service to others.
By praying for God to do His will in our lives and shaping our behavior to reflect that request, we leave room for God to bless us in ways we can’t even imagine. And we’ll be successful, even if that success doesn’t line up with what little old us had imagined.
1% is SO MUCH BETTER than 0%
If you’re in a rut or feel like you are so far away from your goals that there’s no point in trying, remember that a 1% effort will take you farther than a 0% effort. You may move at a snail’s pace, but even a snail covers a little distance every day.
What does 1% look like?
- Moving the laundry from the washer to the dryer
- Reading class descriptions before it’s time to enroll
- Editing your resume
- Attending a networking event (you don’t even have to talk to anyone, just show up)
- Stepping foot in the gym, even if you don’t workout
Then the next day, make another 1% effort. For example:
- Fold the laundry and put it away
- Put classes in your shopping cart
- Ask a friend to look at your resume
- Attend a networking event and talk to one person
- Go to the gym and walk on the treadmill
And if you stack these 1% efforts, day after day, you will significantly improve your life. One of my favorite quotes is:
“Great things are done by a series of small things brought together.”
Vincent Van Gogh
A Reminder for Aspiring Stay-At-Home Moms
In conversations about being successful, choosing to leave your career to stay home with your babies is never mentioned. There are many reasons for this, but let’s say it’s because measuring the “success” of a stay-at-home mom is difficult.
In the medical field, success is measured by patient outcomes. In finance, it’s dollars. Marketing looks for engagement. These are all metrics that we can put on nice little spreadsheets for our supervisor to review.
But for moms at home, success isn’t a term that often comes to mind. There isn’t a spreadsheet. There’s no yearly performance evaluation. There’s no raise. There’s no promotion. At least, not in the sense that we grow used to in the working world.
And if you’re currently in that world, stepping into life at home can seem like a demotion. You may even be surrounded by people who speak as if it is. I’ll go into depth on this later, but for now know this: you are replaceable in every position you hold except for that of “Mother”. It is not portrayed as glamorously as breaking the glass ceiling is, but in it you will find a true sense of purpose and meaning. The love of your children enriches your life more than any kind of career success ever will.
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